Anyone who has been to a festival will know that on the final day you develop a routine that has been determined by the foolish errors you have made over the past few days. Sneaky thorn bushes are no longer a problem as your skin has now hardened to a nice leathery texture and your eyes have developed a extra layer of skin to protect themselves from the dust and debris. I decided I would take my newly evolved body to the shower as I could laugh at all the lesser beings who had not adapted to their environment.
Upon arrival I saw a kilometer long line leading to the showers and nearly turned back. However, after closer inspection I realized that it was the girls showers that had a kilometer long line. I walked straight past the very miserable looking girls holding onto my toilet paper, towel and soap. I joined the 5 long line and within 5 minutes I was enjoying an icy cold shower.
To my horror I discovered that my new hardened skin was actually a mixture of brandy, wine and sand and it was washing off, leaving my epidermis exposed to the harsh world that is Oppikoppi. My newly grown eye protectors were actually transparent sweet papers that had become stuck to my eye balls and had since washed off, taking a thin layer of eye skin with them. I left the shower disappointed that I was not a superior human being and had not evolved over the past two days. I sat on the toilet and shed a little tear.
I returned to my tent and kept my loss to myself. By now most people were stirring and plans of breakfast were in full effect. We returned to the entertainment area and filled our bellies with the disgusting yet good Breakfast Schwarma. The day's line up was about to begin and we were all ready. Hopefully for the best day yet.
We spent the whole of Sunday walking around and enjoying all the bands on show. Fire Through The Window entertained the crowd at the FHM Most Amazing Myn stage. Their music kept making me feel that I was in a Shrek movie and I kept thinking I saw a donkey in the corner of my eye. I must admit that they are good, I am just a dick.
I will now give my best performance award of the day award to Wrestlerish. These guys deserve all the attention they are receiving and are likely to go a lot further. Werner Olckers's Voice is pristine and when joined by Richard Brokensha (Isochronous vocalist/guitarist/future South African great) for a duet, the vocal pair managed to make a lot of girls become quite hot and bothered.
Unfortunately, the day went down hill from here. The Valiant Swart Tribute show made no sense to me and I am still unable to correctly explain it to anyone. We returned home for a final top up of drinks and prepared ourselves for the final chapter in our Oppikoppi experience.
We were greeted with the worst performance of Oppikoppi upon our arrival back at the entertainment area. Die Heuwels Fantasties pulled a massive crowd and had made a huge impact upon the South African scene over the past year or two. However their performance removed any respect I had for them. The Vocalist guy sang out of tune for about 97% of the set(granted that it was obvious his voice was hoarse from the start of the set) and the band played slightly out of time. It was likely that these guys either had their drinks spiked or had little concern about their prime slot on the James Philips stage. We quickly moved away and awaited the start of Blk Jks. Unfortunately we were also let down by the famous South African exports who had moments of brilliance but most of the time seemed loose and a little off the ball.
Billy Talent was the main headliner of the festival and captured the attention of the entire festival. They played a tight set and their World wide fame was displayed for everyone to see. I however found myself annoyed by the vocalists voice and was reminded why I never really took notice of these Canadian rockers. They were good, I am just a dick. By now all interest in live music was lost, we returned to our campsite and for the first time of the entire festival did not get lost on the way home. We saw off the final evening with a pathetic fire and discussions of the weekends mishaps and good times. We payed little attention to Jack Parow blasting from the entertainment area, the loud reception he was receiving from the crowd reflected the brilliant year he has achieved.
The following morning allowed us to display the final festival skill we had acquired over the years. The art of packing up all your shit in 5 minutes and getting the fuck out of there, is a skill that I am proud of. We managed to leave Oppikoppi while some of the stragglers were still trying to find their campsites after the final night of partying. The Drive home was subdued and peaceful.
I am still wearing my Oppikoppi bracelet and I wonder if the organizers will give me a discount if I can provide it when I buy my ticket next year. I love Oppikoppi, even if I can only manage to tolerate it for a maximum of 3 days.
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